By The River

There’s a continental market in town again. In case you’re wondering what one of those is, it’s exactly what it sounds like, a market from the continent.

The smells of garlic sausage and other, more frightening, delicacies fill the air. Eugh. Thank goodness they’re going tomorrow. They’d be alright if they balanced it out a bit with a few more lavender stalls but no. Garlic sausage, and other weird meats that could be used for clubbing seals everywhere you turn! Actually, that’s quite a good idea! Not that I in any way condone seal clubbing because, well it’s barbaric but at least if they used these overly herbed deli treats the poor creatures would be unconscious. Stop it Claire, you’re digging a hole here.

Haha! There are two pretty women over near the swans. I just know they’re French, (the women not the swans) they’re probably here with the market. I know they’re French because one has knelt down to pose while the other takes a picture of her feeding the swans. This won’t go well. Plus she’s trying to feed them a blade of grass. That’s going to upset them.

Maybe the swans in France are more friendly that the ones over here. A bit like the people probably.

Or maybe the swans just don’t like the French.

One of the swans just got hostile as predicted. It started flapping it’s wings and standing up really tall.

And yes, they are indeed French. I know this now because they both just legged it past me shrieking in their beautiful language.

Zut Alore!

In the swans defence they were probably afraid of being eaten or sold on the bloody market.

People watching is fun fun fun!

1.40 pm

A sign of a true Peterborian.

A thirteen year old goes walking by with his older brother (or possibly father, can’t tell), drinking beer. Both of them sporting matching beer cans. How sweet. They’re probably on their way to head-butt something.

1.42pm

Another kamikaze French lunatic is getting dangerously close to the swans. Maybe I should warn…..

1.43pm

…. Too late. Wow, they can really move when they want to.

1.45m

There are children swinging from the branches of a nearby Weeping Willow tree. It wasn’t weeping initially but their dad decided to join in and accidentally amputated a branch. He got up, rubbed his backside and went to sit back down. That’ll teach him!

1.50pm

There is a lot of shouting in the distance. I have managed to pick up the repetivive use of the words f*** and off. Maybe there’ll be a fight.

1.51pm

Or maybe the swans have cornered a new victim. It wouldn’t surprise me to see them waddling past in their cute swan-like way with a human arm in their beaks.

1.52pm

Do swans eat meat?

They seem to have a preference for French cuisine. Maybe next time I’ll bring them some French bread.

You need a good arm for throwing when you feed these swans.

And a bench to stand on.

And decent running shoes.

And a nerve of solid steel.